Every minute

When you're a new mum many people around you may offer advice. Some are welcome, some others... not so much. I believe everyone meant well when they said these but there were a few that used to put quite a lot of pressure on me, and I'm sure some other mums and dads feel the same. These were the popular "Enjoy every minute", "You'll miss it when it’s gone" and "They’re only this little for a short time".
The only effect that these comments had was to make me overthink if I was in fact making sure to soak up every second of every day while they were still so little. Not only that, but it added to the guilt of not enjoying every single minute, because not every bit of parenthood is enjoyable. No parent likes the sleepless nights, seeing your tiny baby feeling poorly, stressing about feeding issues or trying to calm an unsettled baby who won't stop crying, among many other minutes of not-so-enjoyable things. And that's OK. 

Also, literally every minute from the second they arrived into the world has been full: full of feeds, nappy changes, baths, making bottles, putting them down to sleep, bring them to appointments, doing tummy time, taking them out for a walk, - every minute with twins IS full. Even mums and dads with a great support network and one super easy baby are extremely busy, so I always felt a certain aversion towards this kind of comments.   

I want to think I enjoyed it all as much as I could in the midst of the (beautiful) chaos that took over our lives, but I also feel the best part didn’t end in the baby stage at all. Yes, sometimes I would love to be able to go back to the tiny snuggles, baby coos and first giggles, but every stage watching them grow has brought so many ENJOYABLE amazing things.  

Our twins are 4 now and I can look at our two, happy, LOUD, and healthy babies and think... WE did that, we did it all despite the eventful pregnancy, the isolation from COVID, the sleepless nights, the countless feeds, the busyness of our jobs... we did it all.

We now have 4 year olds who we can watch movies with and hear them laugh out loud at the same bits over and over again. 

We now have 4 year olds who tell us they love us and they miss us. 

We now have 4 year olds who run, jump, climb and play non-stop. 

We now have 4 year olds who tell jokes and make us laugh. 

We now have 4 year olds who love to dress up fancy and go to parties and dance.

We now have 4 year olds who say "Good morning mami/papa" in their sweet little voice, and "read" books to us at bedtime. 

We now have 4 year olds who crawl into our bed in the morning and cuddle into us and whisper our bed “is so cosy”.

Sometimes they lie on top of us, which brings me back to when they were tiny babies sleeping on our chest, and it is just as enjoyable now.

I used to worry about making the most of every minute, and sometimes I still do, but I do know that every stage and year will be filled with different moments like these where we will continue to fall in love with our babies every single day. 

So this is for all new mamas (and dadas) who may worry if they are enjoying it all... Just remember that the most enjoyable thing of it all, is watching them grow.