Pregnancy
Being pregnant with twins was, undoubtedly, the biggest physical challenge my body has gone through.
I had every symptom - all of them! Common ones, unusual ones, weird ones, I had them all. Sickness, fainting, insomnia, you name it, I had it. It got very uncomfortable, too, even lying down became a struggle due to the weight of the bump. It also got scary at times with a good few emergency trips to the hospital which was very frightening - maybe even more so for my husband who I think is still fully traumatised by the whole experience.
Between the GP and the maternity hospital I had weekly check ups from pretty early on, which I didn't mind as such, since every successful check up felt really reassuring. I followed all the pregnancy rules strictly, I just wanted them to arrive safely.
It was tough, there's no denying it. But at 37 weeks, our two beautiful babies arrived to make the world a better (and busier!) place. And just like that, all those months of worry and stress were left behind as if they didn't happen (for me, my husband remembers it all very well still).
Prepare
Logistics, logistics, logistics. Planning and organisation became my best friends. Everything you do with twins involves planning, especially when you're doing it solo (This sounds like I'm a single mum, which I'm not - I'm referring to the times when my husband is in the office or away for work).
This wish for being ready kicked in pretty soon on the pregnancy, I wanted to be fully prepared for the arrival in case something unexpected happened early. I didn't want any extra pressure on ourselves. We bought all the essentials as soon as we could, which was very exciting, too. Of course, being in lockdown did influence that as well, as there's only so many Netflix shows you can watch in one day before your brain starts to melt, and online shopping seemed like the most entertaining (& almost only) activity to do during COVID.
Hospital (un)readiness
I think I was both wildly unprepared and overprepared for the hospital stay. I read all the information about what to bring in your hospital bag in multiple websites and booklets provided by the hospital but I don't think I had realistic expectations, at all.
I bought a full washbag with shampoo, face cream, body lotion, body spray etc. that came back home the exact same way that went into the hospital. I didn't have time to even look at it. I was there for 3 nights, by myself (no husband allowed during COVID), absolutely exhausted and trying to get my head around the fact that, in just 2 minutes, 2 tiny people had come out of me and now we had to take care of them for the rest of their lives. Survival mode was ON. They even asked me to fill out their birth certificate forms when I could barely spell my own name correctly. There was just no time for tiny bottles of conditioner & face cleanser.
All I used was pjs, underwear, shower gel, hand cream and chapstick, plus all the standard sanitary items required after delivering the human(s) you just created. Snacks are also a must!
In regards to the babies, I was not prepared for how small they would be. I had brought "newborn" clothes for them, but I could have fitted them both in together in one and the babygrow would have still looked huge. My husband had to do an emergency trip to Penneys and buy "tiny baby" clothes that the nurses brought up to my room. They just lived in those for weeks.
The great arrival
If you have plans about how you want to deliver your babies, make sure that you keep an open mind because they may have a completely different agenda, and even before they are born, they are going to dictate how things are done.
My twin boy decided he was going to completely block the exit so that they would have to be pulled out and introduced to us over a hospital screen in a similar way as Rafiki showed baby Simba to the rest of the animals, but in a much less glamorous fashion. I actually didn't find the C-Section recovery hard, but I know it can be for some mums. The nurses will tell you all that you need to know and do.
There were A LOT of medical staff in the delivery room, doctors and nurses, which was intimidating but at the same time very reassuring.
Feeding - Don't let anyone pressure you into choosing a way of feeding over the other, just do what you want and what feels best for you. You don't owe anyone anything, you've cooked two full babies by yourself, YOU HAVE DONE ENOUGH!
All in all, I learned that whatever way the arrive, all you want is for them to do so safely. Whether is what you had in mind or not, it doesn't matter as long as the 3 of you are healthy.
Home sweet home
I was eager to be sent home but had to stay longer after the C-section and to make sure everything was OK with the babies. It felt like an eternity, but eventually we got there. It probably felt longer due to the fact that my husband couldn't come visit at all, but fortunately all that is way in the past now!
Twin-life just got real
The first couple of weeks felt quite easy for me (if only I'd known). I was so glad to be back home, and so relieved everything had gone well and they were safe and healthy. I was high on the adrenaline of having become a mum to two amazing, beautiful babies.
They slept a lot and they slept anywhere. We didn't try and get into an schedule right away, we kind of went with it for the first few days. We needed some time to get used to their feeds and sleep. I also wanted to get used to do things with them by myself, especially feed them at the same time.
I don't remember having many expectations or plans for when we got back home, I had been so anxious to finally have them with me during the last weeks before they arrived, that I just wanted to slowly enjoy them. I was fascinated by them and their connection, how they would cuddle into each other to sleep, I was just in awe. They were finally here and I was their mama. What else could I ask for?
Tip: make space on your phone because you are going to take A LOT of pictures.